As a young woman and new believer, I used to struggle with reading the Bible. I knew it was one of the Christian virtues we were supposed to do along with praying and giving, but my love of reading did not convert to scripture. I easily read novels and self-help books, however, I found reading the Bible to be boring. I know we’re not supposed to say that, but it’s true. I didn’t understand what I read, so it didn’t hold my attention. I attended weekly Bible studies which helped and I learned a lot but there wasn’t a commitment.
Several weeks ago, I sat at my desk, preparing to have my devotional time, and was faced with an irony. As I prepared to read from Romans chapter 12 I remembered the first time I’d studied the first two verses of this chapter as a young woman and new believer. As an older woman who has grown in Christ, I can now read this passage with a deeper love of scripture.
Background
As a young believer, I was led by the Holy Spirit for several months to drive to a nearby town for a personal retreat. It was something I’d never done before, and as a result, I ignored it for some time before finally giving in. It was the early nineties and technology wasn’t what it is now. I packed enough clothes for the weekend my Bible, a notebook, and a large one-volume Matthew Henry commentary that I’d found at a thrift store for one dollar. It was a treasure that I enjoyed finding.
I arrived on a Friday evening after work and began seeking God’s face the following morning. Not knowing what to do or read, I prayed and asked the Lord for direction. Romans chapter 12 came to mind and I’ll be honest and confess that I never made it beyond verse two. I’d only been a Christian for a couple of years and it was my first time digging into scripture and seeking God‘s face like that. I started with verse one and cross-referenced scripture. I couldn’t believe how much time it took. Using my commentary to expound and explain what I read I began writing notes of what the Lord was saying to me. By the end of the day, I was exhausted, elated, and shocked that so much time could be spent on only two verses of scripture.
God’s message for me was to present myself as a living and holy sacrifice to Him which originated from verse one and to begin renewing my mind through His word stemming from verse two. Before that weekend I was committed to singing in the church choir, but not reading a bible. I was a dedicated Christian, but not to seeking God‘s face.
Present your body
Verse one of Romans chapter 12 tells us to ”…present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service.“ I was single, celibate and dating a preacher in my church during the time of this retreat. I didn’t know much about the prophetic back then, but this word was preparing me for a trial that was right in front of me literally when I returned home from this weekend retreat.
By the end of the following week, my boyfriend and I had broken up, he’d announced his engagement to a woman to whom he’d introduced to me as a “friend” from high school and the entire church knew. FYI it was not a small church. Please keep in mind that these were the days before social media and the gossip moved like wildfire. I was broken and humiliated. My only solace was a young women’s Bible study where I shared what happened and was consoled. It didn’t take long for me to realize that my weekend retreat was the Lord’s way of preparing me for what lay ahead. God is so faithful.
The lesson was clear. Had I not obeyed the prompting of the Holy Spirit, and committed to reading His word I would not have handled that unforeseen trial that lay ahead of me. That weekend was the beginning of a beautiful answer to prayer that came from my heart. That prayer was simple: “Father, please give me a hunger and a thirst for your word.“ This prayer came from a place of sincerity and need. I desperately wanted to love and read God’s word and needed to commit to doing so.
Be transformed
During that weekend retreat, the Lord didn’t stop at verse one but continued to minister to me from verse two. Which says ”…do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind…“ As a young woman, I needed to see myself as God saw me. Someone who was loved and deserved to be loved. As a woman who needed to heal not only from a recent breakup but from childhood traumas as well. Most of all I needed to learn to love myself, and I could only do that, with a renewed mind, a fresh biblical perspective, and by seeing myself the way God saw me which is as a beautiful woman.
My hunger and thirst, for the Bible flourished, and I began to grow spiritually. Becoming a licensed minister, called to preach the gospel all while embracing it as a single woman. I remain committed to living a godly life, celibacy, and doing what God has called me to do. Today, I am completely sold out for Christ, and although I no longer preach I am still committed. I’m proud to say that I have a wonderful personal library filled with books, commentaries, and many different Bibles. The most recent is still coming in the mail. It’s an ESV Chronological Bible. I’m looking forward to reading it as I embrace retirement and my new dream life.
If you struggle to read the Bible, don’t know where to begin, or simply need something new in your devotional time please consider this New Testament printable. Click here.
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